P A C I F I C A (TW: Mental health)

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Profile photo of Misrablest Resident

Misrablest Resident

said

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<p style="text-align: center;">* * * *</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">"Before my father passed away - when I was a girl...</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">He told monsters do exist.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">They live in closets called minds.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Whether you choose to manifest and become one is up to you."</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">* * * *</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I was born with every luxury any girl could have wished for. A beautiful house, a family that loved me, a princess by Right. I owned everything everyone wished to have. I took whatever I wanted if I wanted it bad enough.  My father was my beacon - I was the one who was lost and I followed him where ever he went. He was a business man - the one everyone trusted too much. He built a Kingdom and I was the girl in the tower. He kept the knights away who tried at my hand - had one get too close and nearly had him executed. I had to beg for his life with a promise to never see him again. And it was so.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I think you get the idea. I was groomed to play chess - Move and take pieces to win. Everything to me is about financial superiority - if it does not pay, it is not worth my time. If someone else needs it more, I need it a little more. Good people know I am up no good and to those who figure me out, they are right to avoid me. No one has ever figured me out. I am no fucking Princess. I am no Queen. I am the Monster in the dark forest that seeks to devour the wanderlust.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I am the antagonist - the one that never loses. I do not regret the lives I have destroyed for my own personal gain. Self-centered, confident, overwhelming. I am all of those things and worse. I am sadistically opportunistic. Loyalty means everything - As long as it is loyal to me. These thoughts circulate in my head like a wheel that never stops turning. I cannot change the way I am - so I embrace it. I always get asked... Why are you in Hathian? The shore sings to me beautiful songs. He rages storm surges that crush the wind pipes from this city - I call him Poseidon. This place is where opportunists go to win. Whatever means necessary.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Despite all of these thoughts - I do wish I could be different. I wish I could be virtuous and charitable and loving and kind. I wish I could be the woman that would take care of her man and marry into the simple life. I hate my father for what he has done to me. I HATE HIM. And now he is dead. DEAD. Left me in this shithole. I have to survive. Fuck. I'm doing it again.</p>
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<p style="text-align: center;">Taylor snaps out of her temporal comatose.</p>

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<p style="text-align: center;">"Oh! Sorry! I didn't see you there. Call me Pacifica."</p>

<p style="text-align: center;">* * * *</p>
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December 12, 2022 at 11:30 am
Profile photo of Susan Dallas

susan dallas

said

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January 9, 2023 at 10:56 am
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