This has been something that has been weighing on me. It’s not just one or two instances nor is it just me experiencing it.

There is a disturbing trend of people who act like near death experiences are no big deal. They see a gun and scuff at it or act like it isn’t a life or death experience. It is. A lot of us have death limits and that is ok but that doesn’t mean one should hide behind it. Put aside your own awareness of the death limit and immerse yourself in the scene asking yourself how you would react if you thought you might get shot. Yes. People react in various ways that are not always logical or sound (Ryder did some nervous rambling and ptsd flashbacks) but one should not just stare at it and think it’s no big deal. It disturbs me that even intent of murder is dismissed as no big deal. The “I can’t be killed” attitude is far too prevalent. I see it happen over and over again both to me and other people and it is frustrating. I am tired of it and have considered a range of things such as avoiding combat and quitting entirely. I am  more than willing to take hits and get the short end of the stick. It is endlessly frustrating that it doesn’t seem to matter what I do; opinion of Ryder doesn’t change. Hell, this was an issue with Ellis. He killed three people yet no fear was shown and people weren’t concerned they might die because death limits. I mean it is one thing to act all brave on social media because yeah Ryder has pretended he was not terrified but on scene he would show signs of distress and even after the event he would become unhinged after traumatic events. Ryder is still fairly careful when it comes to people he knows are dangerous. So many just act like it’s nothing and it makes things incredibly frustrating. I’m not saying quiver in fear of Ryder but his actions should garner at least some leeriness of those affected by his chaotic actions. Same for anyone else. It sort of makes scenes and plots pointless if people act like they are superhuman.

Another issue I have is the gun use. I own a gun, yes, but I don’t readily use it. Ryder actually hates guns but rule wise they’re supposed to be last resort. Last resort. Having guns pulled out quickly in a scene is a mood killer. There are exceptions; a good example is as an armed robbery. Obviously that is not the same. There are plenty of other examples but in general it should be last resort. It’s frustrating. There are so many other creative ways to conduct combat scenes. Bring back the fist to fist brawling, y’all.

Anyway, I had to get that off my chest.  Thank y’all for listening. I’ll be honest, though, I’m frustrated that because of issues stated above some plots seem to hold no meaning. It’s a huge hindering and I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. More than once I feel like my story is just a dead end and have considered leaving entirely. One can only take so much before they feel like they might as well have been a stand in plot tree for someone else’s tale. It is not a fun part to play. Anyway, I hope no one takes this personal as it is not geared toward anyone. It’s been on my mind for some time as I rp and also hear about and see other people’s scenes. It’s something I felt important enough to address. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk. Be excellent to each other. *air strums guitar slowly*