((Amber is rather unpredictable and quite emotional. Just a friendly warning, there might be graphic descriptions in her journal entries that might not sit too well with some.))

Well, here I am again. Another week down the drain, and what a hellish week it has been. It was nothing but a major roller coaster that turned me into a puddle of hormonal prego goop. Seems the further along I get, the easier my tears flow. What's with that? Although, this time, I think there's a legitimate reason.

Last time, I started talking about betraying Kat and the bitter feelings I had developed over my time with the Queens. Now, I have to admit, it wasn't all her fault, but didn't sway my decision any. I'll get further into that in just a minute. I just don't get how I was expected to trust them all when there was one who never liked me, never trusted me, couldn't do anything right by her no matter how hard I tried. River was the craziest out of them all, really. Drunk ass bitch who stalked me in my home while I slept, tried to eat me alive, blamed me for her daughter getting a scratch... A SCRATCH! Shit, not my fault some brat attacked the kid. Ah well, I'm getting off topic. My point being, After Rose, well.. after she "left," and Danni ran off, things just weren't the same. I don't know why I can't talk about what happened to Rose, even to this day. I loved that bitch.

Moving on, before I get too emotional here. So, I had been kidnapped by the Reapers, after they destroyed my shop. That pissed me off, ruin my business and then hide me away from the world! What kind of fucked up shit is that? All because they thought the Queens tagged their turf? Maybe the crazy bitches did and they didn't tell me. Hell, it doesn't matter. I wasn't taking the fall this time. After discussing things with Cym, who was hella nice to me and even gave me food, plumbing, and a nasty mattress to sleep on, I ended up switching teams here. I basically sold Kat out. Yea, she wasn't too happy about it. I'll miss the bitch. I mean, I didn't do it because I hated her, well, not totally. Kakihara put some fucked up stuff in my head, and there was no trust. I had always been torn though. I was loyal to Queens for one reason, but Cym was my really good friend, so I had loyalties there as well. It was a hard position to be in.

So I know have the gold rag, and it's been hard getting the others to accept me, which I don't blame them. All they can think about is me turning my back on them. Hey, this traitor business isn't usually me, and not something I take lightly. But now, i have the daunting task of working out how to earn their trust. Lovely.

Well, I need to sneak back home and start moving my stuff out. Or well.. what used to be home. I can't stay in the trailer on Queen turf.. that just won't end well at all. SO, off I go... hope I don't die.