Maybe It’s only a Dream? (Kaynia Clary)

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kaynia clary

said

Maybe it is just a dream... After all, I didn't wish for this, did I?

Tell me why it is that I'm sitting here in a run down bar on the wrong side of a wrong town, sipping club soda for fucking sakes.. Why? Because I couldn't keep my mouth shut.

New Orleans was... Fun.. I enjoyed it there, and I enjoyed the small house I had in the Garden District. And well, as far as Garden District goes, a small house is one without a servant's quarters it seems. So different from growing up in that godforsaken hell hole that I did. But I thought I was doing something good. I thought that I would put my degree to good use and help those needing help after the hurricane. It felt good. It.. Seemed right. And oh.. When I met Steve... I was in love. A tall and strong detective on the NOPD roster. But hmm.. He.. He ended up being something else after we hastily married.

Of course I was surprised when I got offered the job in a city councilman's office. A personal Accountant? Oh yes, count me in. What I didn't count on was that he was deadly good looking with an amazing cock. Of course, perhaps that was one of the many reasons I divorced. Steve wasn't faithful, nor was I. I guess I liked the publicity of being on Roger's arm. I worked hard, and I worked well, and Oh... well.. Details aren't needed.

Things go downhill quickly, don't they? Steve was abusive, moreso when he found out about Roger. Roger seemed a safe haven and pulled a few strings with the courts to expedite my divorce.. I assumed it was because he wanted to have me as his wife. When he asked me to meet him in Houma at his vacation home, I just knew he was going to ask me to marry him. I just knew it. But then, rounding a corner with bad breaks and finding a cypress tree implanted in the front end of the beemer, It all fell apart.

I should have looked at the brake lines.. I know my way around a car, though Roger doesn't know that.. Hell, Steve never knew where I grew up and how I grew up either. I was, after all, ontop of the world surrounded by the chaos after a broken levee. I foolishly called Roger, who no, wasn't concerned, but pissed I wasn't there yet.

It actually wasn't till I put a few pieces of the puzzle together when some guy named Ellis tossed my car and I still think took a few pairs of panties from my bag. He left 10k in cash in a ripped bag, and come to find out, there was more.. 50k to be exact. Roger so wanted me to find a way to Houma as soon as I could. He was angry about it. He became near violent.

I called Steve to see if he could help, of course, he was too busy snorting a line off of a hookers ass to even care. No.. I was screwed.. And quite literally. Roger was milking the campaign for the mayoral election.. He was the incumbents campaign manager after all. That was the money. He didn't want me to be with him for a romantic weekend getaway.. He wanted the cash.

It could only get this bad and worse in a dream, right?

I made the mistake of buying off a cop to give me a ride to Houma, but of course, we never got past the hotel room. I wasn't sure what to make of him at first, but it was fun, and I needed the distraction and the high. Though, perhaps, if I wasn't high, I would have remembered the rubber.

I tried to ignore the possibility for awhile, I counted and recounted the days of my cycle, but it was too close. Finally, a drug store stick showed the positive. It was that night that I was royally fucked. No cash, nope, it was gone. No blow, that was gone too. Nothing but a finger pointed to the bus station and a sharp command to get the fuck out of town. Never would have been a problem if I would have kept my mouth shut with that bitching underpaid hotel maid or whatever she was.

Surely it's a dream.

I went.. I didn't go back to New Orleans though. I went to Houma. I went and I took care of shit and made sure the blood was washed away. But I couldn't go back home, not to the city. But now, I had cash, I had a car once more, and a good reason to keep my trap shut. I dyed my hair an inky black, in hopes that I wouldn't be as noticeable as the red I was born with, that color that made me stand out. I'm still hesitant however, to go to the doctor to either see if the test was a positive, or if I need to wash away the blood again.

There is no way this is real.. It's too.. surreal and unfathomable for someone like me. Surely it's a dream.

April 20, 2011 at 10:47 pm
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ellis-millet

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April 21, 2011 at 7:42 am
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kaynia clary

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April 23, 2011 at 2:03 am
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ellis-millet

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April 23, 2011 at 2:20 am
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kaynia clary

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April 29, 2011 at 11:55 pm
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ellis-millet

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April 30, 2011 at 6:41 am
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kaynia clary

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July 15, 2011 at 2:03 pm
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lake-ansar

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July 15, 2011 at 9:12 pm
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valena vacano

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July 15, 2011 at 10:21 pm
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kaynia clary

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November 13, 2011 at 1:19 am
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kaynia clary

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November 13, 2011 at 3:05 am
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