6-2-09

You never get quite used to it. The murders I mean. No matter how many dead bodies I've seen cut in half, run over, decapitated, shot, stabbed, or burned, I just can not get used to it. I remember back at the academy they would show us videos of crime scenes where men and women were all mangled beyond disbelief. It didn't bother me back then. I could sit and eat a sandwich while they showed us tapes of autopsies, but that time has passed. Now my stomach turns into a knot every time I get the wonderful pleasure of getting called out on a murder scene. I say this because for the past four days now I have not slept. Oh sure, maybe here and there I got an hours nap, but overall I am drained and frustrated.

Had it really already been four days already? I could have sworn that it was just yesterday I got called out to the college. I used to patrol there from time to time when I needed to relax. Watching the students interact with each other brought a smile to my face. The guys would often be out tossing a football around, and a few girls would be watching from a distance, giggling as the boy's running back and forth was their entertainment for the day. Like I said, I used to enjoy patrolling the campus, but not anymore. Every time I walk by the Beta house I am overwhelmed with emotions and memories of the day that bitch did her dirty work on those kids. I can still hear the screams. People running here and there. EMT's trying their best to pump life into all those dead bodies. I see now why I can't sleep.

I had been bothered by several things that night. The death that surrounded me was a major part of it, but there was something more. I felt as if there was something I could have done to stop that night from happening. The department shrink says that I need to tell myself I did everything I could, but honestly, I just can't tell myself that. Maybe if I had been in the area at the time of the attacks I could have saved a few of those kids, possibly made an arrest of that deranged psychopath woman too. My only relief from the personal torture I have been putting myself through was the fact that in the hours and days following the murders, I had filled my time with trying to track down this sick woman people were starting to call " The Blond Butcher. "

I've spent the past few days compiling documents, files, tapes, videos, and more in an effort to get into the mind of this woman. Who is she? Some people have mentioned that she could possibly be a student at the university. From what I have collected I would have to say she is in the correct age range to be a student at the college. Meaning that amongst the populations of students, there could be someone waiting and plotting their next move. I will have to move fast. My actions could be what prevents the next murder, and that would be just fine with me. A break in this case is exactly what I could use right now.

The evidence I was gathering was starting to create a profile for me. Over the past few months, I was able to ascertain that this woman was actually responsible for the abductions, assaults, and murders of several others citizens. She was like a a rabid wolf that stalked her prey at night. This woman had been able to seemingly slip in unnoticed by her victims.Rarely was any evidence recovered that would indicate the victims had put up a struggle. It was almost as if each of them allowed her to get close somehow. Even the college killings were an indication to me that she was possibly already inside the building at the times the killings started. How could someone so sick, twisted, and evil just walk up to these people and not get noticed? I swear this is going to turn every last hair of mine grey!

I will try to sleep on it tonight and hopefully have a better answer tomorrow. I purchased a bottle of sleeping pills to help me get some rest. I feel like taking the whole bottle at times and drifting off to sleep for good. I can't allow myself to think this way. There was a killer on the loose, and I had sworn to protect the people in this city. I have to find this woman and take her out by any means possible. I sincerely plan to do just that.