((This is what she would write down if she was not in jail currently. Aspen is furious and broken to the point of having a full blown meltdown. a.k.a she is absolutely loosing her shit. Theme Song:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jK60GOw5tw))

11/25/2015
Kill him. I'm going to fucking kill him.

"Now you'll know not to challenge a cop." he said, as he forced himself inside me, skin against skin. I felt degraded. I FEEL degraded. I feel like a heaping mess of emotions in which his disease has festered and spread. I felt his disease all over my body, inside me as he finished, in my head as his voice repeats over and over.

"I'm going to make you my sex slave. I've enjoyed having sex with you, I'm going to try to do it again and again, Be a good girl now."
No. No. No. I'm not. He's not. That was not sex. That was rape. There is a difference. Sex is a pleasurable action between two parties in hopes of reaching one final goal of euphoria. Sex is love, it means that you love someone. Rape is the barbaric action of ripping ones sense of security and pride from them, dominating their soul, trying to break them for your own personal gain and amusement.
I promised myself I'd never let a man use me in that way again. I promised myself that I'd never put myself in that position.
I'm going to kill him. I'm going to watch the crimson flow from his wounds and the color drain from his face as I kill him. I want to savagely degrade him the way he did me, with blood on my hands.
I am a person, I am not a slave to whatever he has in mind. He is a monster. He is a monster that is a slave to his own lust, that can't control himself. The way he did it.. he'd done it a thousand times and gotten away from it by hiding behind the shield of HPD.
I have to take care of it, I have to kill it. It doesn't deserve a life, it doesn't deserve a single breath.

I will take away his pride. I will destroy him. Kill him. I'm going to fucking kill him.