I gave the students a test on this 5 week course, and all the answers were of course covered in either the lecture notes or in the class discussion. I hope you will agree that Misti has trained them well as wives and mothers of the future! 🙂

Here are some of the choice answers, and some of the correct ones incidentally! The correct ones are marked in BOLD.

1. When making a meal for your man, name THREE important things to consider?
Preparation, loving thought into what to make, find something that is sure to please him, avoid sitting on the couch with a tray on your lap in front of a blaring TV, Dress the area, have his favourite drink ready, don't be late, keep conversation light, don't nag him, make sexy pudding.
So ... these three things ... would be ... beverages! Manly ones, such as ... beer. And ice tea. Also consider ... chips! So ... it's ... easy to eat? ... Not much difficulty in grabbing a bag of chips. Nice enough to eat too. Last but not least consider ... getting it all ready on time and setting it up in front of the TV. Men don't need no jibber jabber all the time. We watch ... football! And DIY programmes! Don't need to sit around at a table dabbing our mouths with ruddy ... cloth thingies. So ... yeah. //Mary Meek
meat, beer and sex //Cath McMahon
Is he Hungry, What does he want, What do we have. //Natasia Vuckovic
Make it fast, make it hot and make it on time // Quinn Somerset
In the scope of all that is all necessary in making a meal the most important things would be, 1 the dietary needs of the second party visiting the first party in the residence is not a mutual one. 2 the liquid needs of the second party visiting the first party in the residence is not a mutual one, 3 the atmosphere should be not neglected either //Jadzia Decuir

2. What is the most important piece of equipment in your kitchen?
The microwave! (bonus point for writing DE microwave)
the spoon /Bebelbrox
The woman. It washes, gets the food ready, cleans everything. Does whatever you tell it to do. If the woman isn't there, how else is everything supposed to get done? //Mary Meek
a stove // Cath McMahon
a cooking aperatus // Jadzia Decuir

3. Name THREE advantages to having cooked a great meal for your fella/woman?
He won't ask for sex, he won't moan, he's less likely to give you a slap.
If my woman gets me well and truly fed, I might not beat her around as much. Cause, as a man, that's what I do. I still might.... but I might not. Filled up belly can also get men sleepy and maybe they might not want so much of the ... "fun times" later. Not me of course. I'm always ready for action. Real men always are. And the other advantage can be that... get the girl in my good graces? ... Huh. Don't need three advantages anyhow. Getting the man happy should be advantage enough. //Mary Meek
He won't hit you. He may just go to sleep and ignore you, Keeps him happy and not arguing // Tatiana Velinov
They are nicer, Better sex, they shutt up // Natasia Vuckovic
When he is eating he cant yell, hit you or want sex from you. // Quinn Somerset
their contenment of your service rendered, the pleasure of rendering such a selfless act to one you care about
and their enjoyment might overflow into the bedroom // Jadzia DeCuir
they're happier, you're happier, and... lots of sex after... // Kyris Upshaw

4. Pamela Anderson had some great advice on what not to do when your fella is at home, what was this?
Don't poo in front of him, maintain the mystery!
don't fart /Bebelbrox
Have smalll boobs? ... Or something. That's what she shows through her appearance. And right she is. No tits, no appeal. Usually. Who wants a scrawny girly boy type thing? //Mary Meek
do not stand in front of the TV when the game is on // Cath McMahon
Dont poop when he is around // Quinn Somerset
Pamela Anderson loves to dish out advice from keeping the ex's close after break up, to not letting your appearance drop after moving in, she has even given advice to goverment officials even the president of the USA. The question would have to be clarified on the actual aim of the advice to pin point what was wanted. // Jadzia Decuir
Pamela Anderson can go stick her advice up her ass... // Kyris Upshaw

5. If your vacuum cleaner doesn't fit in the corners of a room, what should you use instead?
A straw and your mouth.
Straws. Prolly not curly ones. Or get the little children to go around the room and eat up the bits. Gives em some food at the same time. Two birds with one stone! //Mary Meek
a broom or a pile of old clothes put at the end of a stick // Cath McMahon
The Dog // Natasia Vuckovic
Use a straw to suck up the dirt // Quinn Somerset
As it was instructed in class a straw will work in a pinch placed between the lips and used with human air pressure // Jadzia Decuir
a brush... thing... // Kyris Upshaw

6. What are TWO vital things to do to help you deal with your housework?
Make a rota, schedule or routine, pick up after him/yourself, take one room at a time, do one task at a time, put on some music, do laundry twice a week. (Bonus mark for mentioning drying clothes in the microwave)
booze, soap operas /Bebelbrox
Get the children to do it all. Or as much as possible. Don't waste your time reading things or watching programmes. A womans first duty is to her man so she needs to vitally get focused on that and flipping just do it already. Whining about it won't get it done either. If the children try to mess it all up shut em up and don't let em out. That'll help aswell. // Mary Meek
hire a cleaning lady, hire a second cleaning lady // Cath McMahon
Sponge, Broom // Natasia Vuckovic
the willingness to do such tasks is a vital item needed and motivation // Jadzia Decuir
not being lazy helps! and... having cleaning supplies? // Kyris Upshaw

7. Name THREE things to DO or NOT DO to reduce the number of arguments you have with your partner?
Do have sex, do what you're told, do apologise even if its not your fault,do listen to his complaints, don't whine, don't interrupt or talk back, do admit your mistakes. Don't have children. Do go to the pub to avoid the argument. Do go to a marriage counsellor.
Get the idea into your head that the man is right. Apologise to him already and quit your whining, No flipping chattering and interupting and saying wise ass comments. Won't help you one bit. Us men don't have to put up with women stupidity, Just listen to the man already. Do what he says. It's the right thing. // Mary Meek
alot of sex, give him beer, let him watch the game // Cath McMahon
Hit them, yell, be stupid // Natasia Vuckovic
Dont have an opinion, dont voice your opinion if you do have one, be willing to have sex in lieu of a fight // Quinn Somerset
It is always good if the couple doesn't disagree with the other and if a disagreement happens then one should take the responibility of the blame and quickly apologize // Jadzia Decuir
stay out of their way when they get home from work? or something... have lots of sex... and make nice meals... for them...// Kyris Upshaw

8. Name THREE things that it is your DUTY to do to keep your partner happy and a relationship blissful?
Have sex, keep the house clean, do what you're told, cook nice meals, don't nag him. Keep the children out of the way.
My woman has gotta feed me, clean me and clean my house. And service my NEEDS if you get my drift. Doing what I says helps too. // Mary Meek
sex, more sex, even more sex // Cath McMahon
As stated in class to keep a partner happy keep a clean house, food in their bellies and keep them sexual sastified // Jadzia Decuir

9. According to guest speaker, Mr. Esteban Manen, what is a man's perogative?
“Its important for a man to keep a woman in her place. As all the while she’s be trying… desperately to squirm out of it and pretend she’s something she’s not. It’s a man prerogative… to command”
To do as he pleases /Bebelbrox
Err ... as a man .... it must ... be ... to ... be right. And tell the women what's right. And how they're usually wrong. // Mary Meek
he can have sex whenever he wants // Cath McMahon
That neanderthal had the gall to suggest that a woman in merely there to lash out and recieve the blows of a man // Jadzia Decuir
the man is always incharge? //Kyris Upshaw

10. Name THREE tips to improve your relationship in the bedroom?
Buy a sex game or make one by writing small notes with your requests. Screw them up and pick one at random, Tie your partner up, use a blindfold or handcuffs, Have sex outside, Agree not to have sex for a week, and engage in foreplay every night, Use food or massage oils.
Misti's Tips: Cocaine! Brilliant! Don't like sex? This will get you racing. No coke? Try some ecstasy or drop some acid. Don't bother with cannabis. It'll just mean you can't be arsed!, Your own clothes make a great way to tie each other up. A scarf can be used to tie around the neck, adding that extra element of danger to sex. No scarf? Try a plastic bag over your head - works just as well. Have sex anywhere and everywhere, have it in the toilets at Lou's, in the cemetary. Make sure the place you fuck in is as public as possible! Try outside the cop station, Ass-sex. There's no hole like a brown hole said someone whose name I forget. Plus, you can have a snooze whilst he fucks away, Invite a friend or two. Infact, try swinging! It'll give you a well-deserved rest.
get implants, watch porn, learn to deep throat //Bebelbrox
Not falling asleep. Servicing the guy first rather than farting about whining about "women's needs". Getting at least a bit sobre before doing the deed. Alchohol ain't always gonna help. Unless your girl is real real ugly. Then the only way you might ever touch her is through getting wasted. Trying out new things and changing it up is supposed to help too.... but no sissy candles and incense crap. // Mary Meek
stay naked, sex, think of the other // Cath McMahon
Have sex, don't not have sex, enjoy sex // Jadzia Decuir

11. Name THREE methods of avoiding pregnancy after the event.
DIY abortion, drink high doses of bitter bitter tea, jumping up and down repeatedly after the deed.
Getting the girl to have the pill. Sitting in funny positions, such as doing a headstand all the time. The blood goes in funny positions and sorts out the baby not happening. Oh yeah, wiping up the goo-y stuff afters can help too. //Mary Meek
the day-after pill, alcohol, drugs // Cath McMahon
Drugs, Beating, Pill // Natasia Vuckovic
condom, birth control pill.. things..., and abortions! lots of abortions everywhere! //Kyris Upshaw

12. Which type of coat-hangar should not be used with a DIY abortion?
A wooden one.
metal //Bebelbrox
Wooden ones. The bendy ones are better. A fluffy coating would be best. //Mary Meek
one with rusty metal as it could cause an infection // Cath McMahon
Wire, wooden gives you splinters // Quinn Somerset
as stated in class a wire hanger though the doctor was very specific about the misunderstanding of the complications of using this technique // Jadzia Decuir
a pointy baby killing one? // Kyris Upshaw

13. According to guest speaker, Dr. Morane, whose responsibility is it to provide birth control?
"Guys, never ever expect a girl to be on the pill, even if she says she is just use a condom. And girls, don't expect the guy to -have- a condom, it's both your responsibility."
the woman's //Bebelbrox
The girl. If she doesn't want no babies, then it's up to her to see to it.//Mary Meek
the pharmacy // Cath McMahon
According to the doctor the woman should always have b/c in case the guy does not // Quinn Somerset

14. Consider this scenario. You and your partner must have sex to keep your relationship successful. You have a child. What should you do with the child so you and your partner can enjoy yourselves together, if your child is.....

a) 6 months old?
Leave him/her in the cot and shut the door.
adoption //Bebelbrox
Put it wherever. It's tiny so who cares where it goes? Don't understand anything anyways. No business of the baby what its parent get up to. // Mary Meek
drop the kid at your parent's house. // Cath McMahon
Wait till they fall asleep // Natasia Vuckovic
a child of this age will not be tramatized at all by the sound of love making and can remain in his or her crib during the act of adults having sex // Jadzia Decuir

b) 4 years old?
Tie him/her up outside the house.
put the kid in the back yard //Bebelbrox
Put it in a different room. It might start whining saying its hungry or it wet itself or somethinf so better be safe just in case. // Mary Meek
drop the kid at your parent's house. // Cath McMahon
put them to bed // Natasia Vuckovic
A child this age not old enough to be in school and being underfoot all the time can be put on a schedule and nap times can be utilized or if you are bordering on vindictive the child can be tied outside giving them room to room but not wander off // Jadzia Decuir

c) 9 years old?
Tell him to wander the streets of Hathian.
send the kid to summer camp //Bebelbrox
Shut it upstairs and don't let it don't. Got no right to be shufflling around the whole house as though it owns the place. Man's house, mans rules. // Mary Meek
hire a babysitter and go have sex in a cheap motel room // Cath McMahon
Send them to the store // Natasia Vuckovic
this child is old enough to send to school or pawn off on friends to have the child not around during the love making scenes // Jadzia Decuir