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💛 CD:ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ғᴏʀ ᴀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ.
From the earliest moment in my life that I could remember I was never happy, I could count on my hand the few times I was happy- my 7th year birthday and when my friend tweety-bird gave me her favorite Barbie doll, also the time my father said he loved me before he ran out on us- that's it. I was born in Washington D.C, we lived in those small- cramped basement apartments with the little bar windows that showed the street above your head. I would look up at that window and wonder if people knew we were down there- (there were stairs leading down but as a kid you feel small and hidden.-
We moved to the deep south to stay near an old friend of my mom who lived near baton rouge where my mother had found a job and solace with a man who was not my father but a drug dealer, they spent time together and as I grew older I realized he provided my mother with ways to cope with working and being a single mother...drugs and time away with him for all hours of the day and night. Soon I saw less and less of my mother and it became apparent to me that I no-longer mattered. Her IT in her brain now took the reigns and it was clear that she only cared to satisfy her base needs than to be home and be a mother to me.
The dragon I chased was of coke and monetary gain. In my intent on seeking happiness I turned into my mother but now as the years have past I save my money and hope to open up my own business, I do what I have to do and eventually moved to Hathian and learned a way to wash what money I get from those who get it the hard way. Maybe I can find a place to put my skill to use and get the life I want for myself...the life I deserve.
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